Unfocusing

I’ve been up for three hours already and have had the word “focus” in my mind since last night, when Kate sent out the prompt. And yet… I can’t focus on a word or a theme.

There’s always a reason these days to lose focus – I wanted to get to bed early because the night before was filled with interruptions. This morning, Elle woke up bright eyed and ready to go before six; I needed a cup of coffee; Bea woke up and wanted to do puzzles. There’s always a pull from my attention.

I enrolled in a blogger’s workshop and one of the questions was to think of the why for blogging – what’s your focus. My mind drew a blank. I’m not really a mommy-blogger or a faith-blogger or anything. I just write about life and try to piece things together. It feels very unfocused.

IMG_9955.jpgMaybe I’m putting too much emphasis on having a focus these days. I could say my kids are my focus but that’s not completely true (or healthy…) My own passions certainly aren’t my focus, though I’m learning to make space for them. Frank and I are trying to carve out focused date nights in this highly-dependent season.

Perhaps what I really need to do is embrace the unfocusedness of this season. To recognized that I simply can’t one hundred percent focus on anything – and that’s ok.

I’m not saying I need to spread myself thin or do things in a half-hearted manner. But, if I shift my expectations and change my thinking, perhaps the truly important aspects of this season will come into focus. They may change from day to day or hour to hour and I’m learning to go with the flow.

Are you in a stage where you can be focused on goals or are you in a season of bits and pieces?

Linked with Kate Motaung’s Five Minute Friday, a time to write without editing. Today’s prompt is focus.

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12 thoughts on “Unfocusing

  1. Perhaps, in this season, your focus is in each moment. To focus on Elle’s bright and cheerful welcome to the day, to focus on Bea’s conversation as she does her puzzles, to focus on Frank’s words and that he knows he has your focus even if it’s only for a few moments. There is a fulfillment within as you focus and engage in the moments of your day.

  2. Stopping by from FMF. Thanks for being real and sharing where you are now. I’m in a place of bits and pieces, but learning the importance of taking time out to focus and fill my thoughts with one thing. I can hop around on so many rabbit trails in my head. Give yourself the gift of setting a few minutes aside each day to just sit still, breathe deep and turn down the noise. You’ll be happy you did!

  3. Hey, Annie, I’m with you. Sometimes the unfocus is good, and that’s what makes it interesting and rich. It’s what makes you you and how you tie the world together with your perspective is focus enough for this reader. Everly grateful -Christina @www. Creativeandfree.com/focus-2/

  4. There’s so much goooood in this post, Annie. You’re in a time of life where focusing on anything for more than a few minutes is ask but impossible. You’re prioritizing your family, and that is good. Sometimes it’s hard to be moving from one moment to the next with seemingly no direction, but you’re moving with the flow of your family and the needs of the moments. There’s something beautiful in doing that. I’d say you’re “Unfocusedly focused.” 😉

    1. Thanks so much, Jeanne. It certainly doesn’t come naturally but I’m learning to let go, to snuggle without guilt, and to remember these “unfocused” moments…

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